The KNOW IT ALL!
WHO ARE THEY?
Like the name implies a Know-It-All (K.I.A) is someone who thinks they know it all. They have strong opinions on almost EVERYTHING and believe they’re right ALL THE TIME. You will know you’re dealing with a (K.I.A.) when they take up all the air in the room and you need to decompress afterwards.
WHY ARE THEY SO DIFFICULT?
They can be one of the most troublesome people to deal with, as they can be adult bullies. Their behavior can lead to strained associations and over time- people may begin to AVOID them, choosing DISTANCE rather than face the DISCOMFORT of being full-court pressed.
COMMON CHARACTERISTICS:
1. They’re fundamentally Insecure:
Insecurity leads to inferiority & can lead to a distorted development of a superiority complex. Desperate for VALIDATION, the (K.I.A) constantly attention-seeks asserting their knowledge and expertise.
2. They’re COVERTLY Narcissistic:
They hide their narcissism behind a trait that society values- being knowledgeable. Their entire identity centers around their knowledge and dispensing that knowledge to JUSTIFY their way of thinking.
3. They Can’t Read the Room:
They miss non-verbal signals (facial expressions of annoyance or discomfort). Having poor listening skills and ignoring social feedback, they don’t stay in their lane, and as a result, take NO OWNERSHIP for making others feel uncomfortable.
4. They Fish for Arguments:
They argue to prove themselves superior & are quick to label those who disagree with them as stupid, correcting others in condescending and socially inappropriate ways. They THRIVE on provoking people, because it gives them the drug they crave most: CONTROL.
5. They Need to Control:
They monopolize conversations, coming across as the ultimate authority on assorted topics, thereby attempting to regulate their ENVIRONMENT & the PEOPLE around them. It’s a way of pacifying their own insecurity in an uncertain threatening world- which they FEAR.
TIPS DEALING WITH A (K.I.A):
1.Do NOT Debate:
Don’t get sucked down the Rabbit Hole they are TRYING to suck you into. Disagree or get offended & they will GASLIGHT YOU, claiming that you are the one who is actually being aggressive. Because they’re right about everything- don’t waste your time.
2. Do NOT Engage:
THE BAIT is to make it PERSONAL and the (K.I.A) purposefully presses your BUTTONS to solicit an emotional response- to get a rise out of you. They fuel up on others HURT FEELINGS and don’t mind if you are offended.
3.React with Repetition:
If pushed for a response- repeat…repeat, repeat (in nonchalant fashion) ... EX: “I hear you. I’ll take it into consideration.” Of course, those responses will NOT satisfy them, so expect the (K.I.A) to relentlessly PUSH for your eventual compliance.
4. Honor your own feelings:
Seek a 1-on-1 situation of your choosing (no audience) and let them know how their behavior affects you. Use “I” statements (without attacking them). EX: “I felt extremely uncomfortable when you ….” Expect them to be surprised- Remember, they can’t read the ROOM.
5.Make Healthy Choices:
If they persist upon CROSSING your LINES- you may need to temporarily distance yourself or limit the interactions. Setting healthy boundaries can PROTECT your WELL-BEING and maintain the relationship with them on more manageable terms.
P.S. POINT TO PONDER: “How come (K.I.A.’s) don’t know how annoying they are?” - Unknown
B.P.S. Godspeed- you might also need a gummy, Bro😊… From the Lookout Post
Sources:
https://sourcesofinsight.com/know-it-alls/
https://www.psychmechanics.com/characteristics-of-a-know-it-all-personality/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/ambigamy/201701/15-tips-disappointing-the-know-it-alls-in-your-life
https://neurolaunch.com/know-it-all-behavior/#google_vignette
https://hackspirit.com/how-to-deal-with-the-know-it-alls/